沪江考研携手海天教育有奖参赛征文[15]

[名师点评]本文写作定语从句犯得错误较多。而且任何形式的考试中的图表作文写作中，基本规则是不用把图片描写的过于细致，主要部分是通过图表反映出什么。而且图表主要描述出最高和最低两个点就行，不用每个百分比都描述出来。建议看看前几页的文章以及老师的评语。

Comparison of the desirable job criteria of undergraduate

In this competitive modern world, hurting job is a great work and burden for the undergraduate. How to find a desirable job and what is the perfect job isarethe most complex questions which troubles them for a long time.

A ballet-dancer can dance and rotate with a fixed aim, and then theyhe will have a charming dancing without any vertigo and fall. So we can see that a goal is very important.

This bar chart describe it vividly, each of undergraduate has his way. Most of undergraduateschoose thestablestabilityas their goal of job hurting, whichaccountingaccountsfor 96%; the secondly is high payment, whichaccountingaccounts for 77%; the third one is opportunity of job developing, whichaccountingaccounts for 65%; the fourth one is taste and interesting, which accountingaccounts for 50%; the last one is doing a perfect work and have a career achievement, which accountingaccounts for 26%.

From this bar chart, we can see that most of undergraduate takestable as their career choice. And only a small part chooses having a career achievement as their goal.

Facing this complicated and volatile economic environment both at home and abroad, as a undergraduate, we have no choice but an opportunity of working stably, therefore, find a stable job become the goal of undergraduate in overwhelming majority.