沪江考研
上海新东方学校校长解析2005年考研作文
来源:沪江论坛 | 时间:2005-09-07 | 作者:汪海涛 | 阅读:8438 次 | [ ] [收藏] [划词] 评论 0 条

汪海涛,上海新东方学校校长。四六级、考研英语辅导专家,口译教研组组长。曾先后荣获“北京大学十大杰出青年教师”,“北京大学优秀教师”的称号。年仅28岁被提升为北京大学大学英语教研室主任。1998年在北京新东方学校任国内考试部教师,曾多次被评为新东方学校优秀教师。2002正式全职加盟新东方,由于出色的工作与管理业绩,2003年被任命为上海新东方学校校长。

2005年考研真题作文
Part A
【题目要求】
Directions:
Two months ago you got a job as an editor for the magazine Designs & Fashions. But now you find that the work is not what you expected. You decide to quit. Write a letter to your boss, Mr. Wang, telling him your decision, stating your reason(s) and making an apology.
Write your letter with no less than 100 words, write it neatly on ANSWER SHEET 2. Do not sign your own name at the end of the letter, use “Li Ming” instead. You do not need to write the address. (10 points)

【题目类型】
应用文中的事务信函。从2005年起,考研取消了听力,在写作部分考两篇文章,模仿了雅思考试,第一部分为信函。由于考试中要求写出正式的书面语语体,因此信函排除了家信,属于给单位、领导、国外发出的事务信函。内容包括感谢信、投诉信、咨询信、建议信、邀请信、安排信、致歉信、祝贺信、安慰信、申请信、推荐信、定货信、退货信、求职信、辞职信等。2005年大纲样题公布的是定货信,实际考查的是辞职信。

【审题构思】
 考研英语作文对信函的要求并不高,只要写出100个词汇。类型上与简单提纲作文相似, 也分了三点内容加以陈述表达。从格式上考虑,今年要求的辞职信应当写出三个部分:称谓、信体、签名。根据提纲信体部分还要写出三个内容:决定、原因、致歉。

第一段要求讲出个人决定。由于事务信函讲究开门见山说意图,可以用一句话首先明确自己想要辞职的意图,之后结合要求中提供的部分信息,说明两个月后发现工作并不符合自己的职业预期,说明做出决定是经过了深思熟虑。

第二段为原因列举段,需要考生举一反三讲细节。可以把它看作一个完整的原因列举段,用中心句统领全段,之后讲出几个不同的原因。其实内容很好构造,可以假设工作不能发挥个人潜力、收入不高以及父母生病等等。一个原因显得单薄,根据考试作文的习惯,我们尽量写出三个原因。

第三段要表示道歉。的确如此,刚刚工作了两个月,可能试用期都没有干完就走人,辜负了领导的信任,又会耽误报社的工作,必然要做出正式道歉。

【推荐范文】
Dear Mr. Wang,
 I would formally request to
resign from my present post as editor for the magazine Designs & Fashions. During the two months of probation period, I find the job totally different from what I expected. After weigh everything, I have made up my mind to quit this job.

 There are three factors accounting my decision. First, the job is not challenging enough to bring my potential into full play. I prefer being active and meeting different people to staying stagnant in the office. Second, with the poor salary, I can hardly afford to rent my present apartment with two bedrooms. Third, my mother is in hospital due to her serious heart problem. I have to return to Hangzhou to look after her.

 I want to apologize for the inconveniences I have caused. Thank you for your attention to my request.  I look forward to your reply as soon as possible.

                                                Sincerely yours,
                                                  Li  Ming

【妙笔生花】
第一段开门见山讲意图,直接使用了“I would formally request to …”句型,作为一种申请形式讲出来,非常正式规范。表示辞职意图时分别使用了“resign from my present post” 和 “quit this job”两个不同的表达。“做出决定”的表达有“decision”和“make up one’s mind”,语言追求了变化。表示“深思熟虑”的用词为 “weighing everything”。

第二段的原因列举段直接采用了经典的段首句“There are three factors accounting for my decision”, 除了词组“accounting for”成为闪光点外,语法上采用了分词做后置定语,也属写作中的特色表达。在表述第一个原因时采用了词组“bring one’s potential into full play”、 “prefer…to…”、“stay stagnant”。

第三段的首尾属于传统事务信函的套路。由于字数要控制在100-150词之间,只要把传统的感谢道歉句型罗列出来即可。三句话的次序分别是:先郑重道歉,再感谢领导考虑自己申请,最后期待早点收到回信。语言都是地道的句型,在其它信函中仍然可以套用。

Part B
【题目要求】
Directions:
Write an essay of 160-200 words based on the following drawing. In your essay, you should first describe the drawing and interpret its meanings, and give your comment on it.
You should write neatly on ANSWER SHEET 2. (20 points)

【题目类型】
图画作文中的问题解决题。通过幽默漫画形式揭示出现代社会中子女们拒绝赡养老人的问题。2005年长作文要求160-200词,难度降低。提纲分为三个内容,既然漫画已经充满了讽刺,形式上也就和1998年的“如此承诺”、2000年的“世界商业捕鱼简史”、2003年的“温室中的花朵经不起风雨”类似,结尾一定要写出建议措施段。

【审题构思】
现代社会中,随着居民住房条件的改善,四世同堂的局面已大大减少,家庭结构以核心家庭以及丁克一族为主。由于子女成年后长期不和父母住在一起,感情淡漠,也就忽视了赡养老人的责任和义务,甚至还有虐待老人的情况出现。本图表面是足球赛,但四个子女防守意识如此强烈,老父亲很难进入某一个子女的领地,夹在中间痛不欲生。如此残酷的场面令人想到了莎翁名著《李尔王》,李尔王好在还有一个小女儿收留,本图中的四个子女都拒绝赡养父亲,如此严重的问题确实引起了社会的广泛关注。

第一段是传统的图画描述段。由于不需要阐释现实意义,就从足球赛的表面信息出发,描述一下四个子女以守门员的姿态严加防范,老夫亲绻成一团,像足球一样被踢来踢去。

第二段要从画面进入现实意义。由于题目中已有“养老”两字出现,创作时紧扣主题发挥即可。可提到老年人的生活现状,退休之后既没有经济收入,还疾病缠身。部分子女过度投入在自我的工作和家庭生活中,忽视了赡养老人,更有甚者,部分子女还虐待老年人。

第三段的建议措施可以从三个方面出发。首先,政府要制定明确的法律法规保障老年人权益,惩罚那些丧尽天良的子女。其次,我们还要认识到赡养老人是中华民族的传统美德,要继承发扬。此外,除了给父母寄钱,还需要给予他们感情上的关怀。只有这样老年人才可能快乐舒适地度过晚年。

【推荐范文】
 The cartoon vividly depicts an intense football match with participants involving an old father, his three sons and his daughter. What makes the cartoon surprising lies in the fact that all the children play the role of goalkeepers in all four corners, while the father crouches into the shape of a football. As the football rolls to each corner, the goalkeeper tries to block its way and kick it away.

 Undoubtedly, the picture arouses deep concern over the issue of caring for old parents. Nowadays, Chinese family system is dominated by nuclear family and DINK style. The senior citizens tend to suffer from all sorts of diseases and have no means to support themselves, but the children are so self-centered that some of them shirk the responsibility of supporting their parents. Even worse, some children have betrayed their own conscience to ill-treat their parents.

 Therefore, it is imperative that we should take some effective measures. On the one hand, we should appeal to our governments to make concrete laws to protect the parents’ legal rights and punish those cold-blooded children. On the other hand, we should enhance people’s awareness that caring for the aged is the traditional virtue of Chinese culture. More importantly, we should not only support the parents financially but also care about their emotional need. The popular song “Back Home Regularly” has reflected such a public appeal. It is in this way that parents can lead an enjoyable and comfortable life in their late years.

【妙笔生花】
第一段对足球赛场面进行了直接描述,涉及到 “intense football match”、“goalkeeper”、“rolls to each corner”、“kick it away”, 语言纯粹集中到踢球的环节。对老父亲和子女所扮演的角色进行了定位,使用了 “play the role of”、“block its way”和“crouch into the shape of a football”等精确描述。

第二段为意义阐释段,首先指出问题 “arouse deep concern”(引起人们的深切关注),之后分析中国近年来的家庭结构变化,点出 “nuclear family”以及 “DINK style”这样的术语。之后批评子女的三大罪行: “self-centered”(以自我为中心)、 “shirk the responsibility”(推卸责任)和 “betrayed their conscience to ill-treat their parents”(昧着良心去虐待父母)。全文中对老年人的描述使用了“old parents” “senior citizens”和“the aged”,语言变化丰富。

第三段分三个层次提出建议,分别用 “On the one hand”、“On the other hand”和“More importantly”,从政府措施到美德意识,再到赡养老人的实际做法,逻辑结构非常严谨。段落中心句 “It is imperative that we should…”属于虚拟结构,句式有难度;而最后一句 “It is in this way that …”又挑战了语法中的强调句型,句式追求了丰富多变。尽管“养老”话题不易通过复杂语言展开,本文却成功地应用了议论文的书面语表达,达到了高分所需要的语言层次。


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      上海新东方学校

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